A Heapin' Helpin' of JohnnyU

Hi, everyone! I think I'm finally starting to reach a huge readership. My fans have grown exponentially and they now number in the One's (though someday I may have tens of fans). I'm reasonably sure that my mom would read this blog - if she knew how to get on the internet. Let me clear out some stuff that has been cluttering up my 'Blog tickler file' for a while now.

• I have NO earthly idea how these guys accomplish some of these things with just a ping pong ball, but this video blows me away. Here's the link if the window below stops working.
  

• One thing that I do know is that it would take a lot of hours with a ping pong ball before you were able to pull this stuff off - and I'm not sure what that says about you. I think it's kind of like being really, REALLY good at bowling or playing pinball. Yes, it's a skill, but by showing your expertise, all you're really telling the world is that you've spent a LOT of your life in a bowling alley. It would kind of be like bragging to your friends that you hooked up with Janet Reno when you were in high school. Even if it's true, it might be something best kept to yourself.

• Even former NBA superstar Michael Jordan couldn't help the Miami Dolphins last week. Jordan responded to a request by Dolphin DE Jason Taylor, a friend of his, to give the winless team a pep talk at the Miami training facility last week. The team responded to the motivational speech with a 40-13 home loss to the hapless Jets. (Maybe they should have asked him to suit up; they could have used him in the backfield).
  

• From the "Who Ever Said Chivalry Was Dead?" file, feast your peepers on this dude, who clearly knows how to treat a woman with love and respect. My theory is that he brainwashed her, because if not, they were probably divorced before the film in the camera got developed.

---JohnnyUnitas