On This Date in Football History

September 11, 1999

The Baylor Bears, leading 24-21 with 20 seconds left and needing only to take a knee and run out the clock against a UNLV team with no time-outs left, get greedy and it costs them the ball game.
With the ball on the UNLV 8-yard line, Baylor running back Darrel Bush takes the handoff and tries to score another touchdown, but he's stripped of the ball at the goal line and Kevin Thomas of the Runnin' Rebels returns the fumble 100 yards for a 27-24 UNLV win before a disbelieving crowd in Waco, Texas.

(source: Page-A-Day Calendars)

Great News if You're a Lions Fan

I know the Detroit Lions can't be bothered to address their QB position (though Jon Kitna has been a serviceable starter, I suppose), seeing as how they're so busy drafting wide receivers in the first round every year, and letting their best defensive player - Shaun Rogers - leave in the offseason, but this quote was still somewhat eye-opening.

According to this article from MLive.com, Lions offensive coordinator Jim Colletto can barely stand to watch second-year QB Drew Stanton throw his wobbly, lame-duck passes.

"I kind of close my eyes and don't pay attention,'' Colletto said with a smile.
"Sometimes he reverts back to some old habits. Today, he didn't throw an interception so that was a huge plus.''

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another 4-12 season of Lions football! Big hand for the fellas.



---JohnnyU

Jason Taylor is Light on His Feet

Jason Taylor has not yet gotten voted off 'Dancing With the Stars' (if that's how that show even works - it appears to be a lock-stock-and-barrel ripoff of 'American Idol'), but it's clearly no secret that new Dolphins head-honcho of football ops, Bill Parcells, isn't happy about that at all.

From Pro Football Weekly today:

One Dolphins insider remarked how ironic it is that troubled RB Ricky Williams has the full support of executive V.P. of football operations Bill Parcells, while Parcells has given the cold-shoulder treatment to consummate team leader Jason Taylor. Parcells subscribes to the “football comes first” mentality, something that Taylor has done throughout his distinguished career, whereas Williams has rarely demonstrated that commitment. However, Parcells’ differing treatment of the two players is a sign that the “What have you done for me lately” mantra is alive and well inside Dolphins headquarters. While Taylor has been mostly missing in action in Miami’s offseason program as he participates in the television show “Dancing with the Stars,” Williams has seemingly rededicated himself to football after having torn a pectoral muscle last November in his first game back from an 18-month NFL suspension.

If I'm reading that correctly, it seems that the Tuna would have preferred that #99 spent his offseason burning blunts with Sticky Icky Ricky than tripping the light fantastic in Hollywood. But I could be wrong (and have been before).


---JohnnyU

From the "Is That a Friggin' Fact?!" File

In the early 1880s, the Northern Pacific Railroad Company hoped to run its railroad tracks through the town of Coulson, Montana, but the three men who owned most of the surrounding land wanted more money than the railroad was willing to pay. So Northern Pacific moved the tracks and built its own town, which it named after the railroad’s president, Frederick Billings. Coulson was a ghost town by 1885; today Billings is the largest city in Montana.


(Boy, those three dudes who decided to hold out for more cash sure were a bunch of bright visionaries, huh? Didn't they see 'There Will Be Blood'? If not, they should check it out... Good flick.)


---JohnnyU

T.O. is Cool and Handsome... Just Ask Him.

It's not a huge secret that Terrell Owens has an ego larger than the innn-tire state of Texas - remember him knocking out a few hundred situps in his driveway a couple of years ago?

But now word comes from the Dallas Morning News that T.O. has decided to do something new and revolutionary for him:

HONOR HIS CONTRACT

Yes, apparently this is something that needs to be covered by the local Dallas newspaper. This baffles me, that a guy planning to honor the contract he signs somehow makes him a guy of integrity.

"I'm going to let God fight that battle for me. There was a situation where the contract didn't work out in Philly. With this, I'm going to let it play out and not try to be a distraction.

T.O. went on to say how much he wanted to remain with the team - and did so in inimitable T.O. fashion:

"For sure, I definitely want to end my career with the Dallas Cowboys, and go into the Hall of Fame as a Dallas Cowboy," said Owens, who was also promoting his Wednesday appearance on the MyNetworkTV sitcom Under One Roof.

Uhhh, Hall of Fame? Excuse me, Cart? You're way in front of the Horse - could you please slow down? T.O. is considering himself a lock for Canton? Unbelievable.

And, if elected, he wants to be enshrined as a Cowboy? I guess everyone has forgotten about him stomping on the Dallas star a few years back, hmm?

T.O. clearly has.



---JohnnyU

I Think I Hate Derek Jeter

This just in: breaking news from the South Florida Sun-Sentinel that Maxim magazine's soon-to-be-released Hot 100 List for 2008 contains six (count 'em, SIX) ladies who at one time or another have been romantically linked to one Derek Sanderson Jeter.

The six lovelies are (and this is in decreasing order of hotness, according to Maxim): Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minnillo, Gabrielle Union, and Mariah Carey.

I think I have to take issue with that order, however - as I would rank them like this:

1A. Jessica Alba
1B. Jessica Biel (can't really pick a winner here)
3. Vanessa Minillo
4. Scarlett Johansson
5. Gabrielle Union
146. Mariah Carey (this one actually detracts from Jeter's conquests, IMO; crazier than an outhouse rat)

So not only does D.J. have a $189 million contract, plays in the biggest city in the world, gets to hook up with ridiculously attractive starlets, but he's also a helluva nice guy.

How do I know this?

Because when I went to a game at Yankee Stadium in 1999 (the day David Cone threw his perfect game), we were there like two hours early, sitting about 10 rows behind the Yankee dugout.

Sure enough, who pops out of the dugout but Jeter - looking to see if any kids needed autographs. The stands were mostly empty, but several kids were close by and even more swarmed the area once they caught a glimpse of The Cap'n.

He couldn't have been nicer; stood there and signed everything for everyone.

Makes it hard to hate him, but I'm trying.


---JohnnyU

This Just In: Peyton Manning NOT a Robot

This may be really old, but if so I never saw it - Peyton Manning going OFF on his offensive line on the sideline during a game. It kind of made me laugh, mostly because corporate America (and of course Peyton himself) never lets us see this side of #18.




I especially like the way big Tarik Glenn finally has heard enough and tells his QB to go sit his butt back down on the bench. Also, be sure to catch backup QB Jim Sorgi jumping in to Peyton's defense - Dude sure knows what side his bread's buttered on.

It's hard to believe that Peyton and Eli are from the same gene pool. Temperament-wise, they seem *nothing* alike.


-JohnnyU

Manu is Clutch

(Photos by Greg Nelson/Sports Illustrated)

Great photo of Manu Ginobili icing the double-OT win against the Suns on Tuesday night. I don't know if that little Argentinian (he's 6'6", actually) is worth $10 million a year ($9,079,811, actually), but he does seem to make big shots when they need them.

But in this one, Shaq doesn't seem to enjoy Manu's work very much...



---JohnnyU

"Eli & Abby, Sittin' In a Tree..."

So Eli Manning got married over the weekend in Mexico? A couple of things struck me about this story:

1) I was surprised at how NICE the article was - considering that it was published in the New York Daily News, I expected to see an excoriation. Although I suppose winning a Super Bowl for a Gotham City team causes the tabloids to call off the dogs somewhat, hm? I guess so.

2) My second question is, at one point in the story, it is reported:

Some guests estimated the wedding cost Manning around $500,000, a modest sum compared to most celebrity weddings.

Seriously? $500k is a modest sum for a wedding? Just because Tommy Mottola spent $3 million on his 'storybook' wedding to Mariah Carey - so that they could pledge their unending troth to one another, and then get divorced like nine months later, does not (repeat, *not*) make a half-million a 'modest sum'.

One thing I will say is that they look like a happy, normal couple. She doesn't look like she'll become some kind of nightmare - but then, what do I know?

I thought Anna Nicole Smith would keep Bobby Trendy as her decorator forever - so I'm not so trustworthy on predicting things.

Drew Rosenhaus Might Be the Devil

I always thought that Scott Boras was about as bad is got when it came to sports agents, but Drew Rosenhaus seems to be giving Boras a run for his money.

Now he's got Cowboys RB Marion Barber convinced that he's worth as big of a contract as LaDainian Tomlinson.

Cowboys, RB Barber $10 Million Apart
Calvin Watkins, Dallas Morning News

The Cowboys sent their latest offer to restricted free agent RB Marion Barber III with a price tag of $30 million. Barber and agent Drew Rosenhaus are seeking a deal worth $40-60 million, ie. Larry Johnson, Ladanian Tomlinson territory. The Cowboys are believed to be targeting the contract signed by Falcons RB Michael Turner, who has a six year, $34.5 million contract ($15 million guaranteed) in place. But sources said the team would be willing to give Barber a contract close to what Baltimore gave Willis McGahee last year (seven years, $40.12 million, including the final two years picked up).

If I remember that Sports Illustrated article correctly, Rosenhaus got his start hanging around the Miami Dolphins practice field, accosting players as they walked to their cars, promising them big things if they were to leave their current, though presumably more principled and ethical, agents. Dude sounds like Bob Sugar (Jay Mohr) from 'Jerry Maguire'.
Listen, Marion Barber is a nice player, but $60 million? If I can use my best Ahnuld accent for this, "Dat's a good vun..."


---JohnnyU

"10-Table" Super Bowl Ring

I imagine you've seen the stories of Michael Strahan of the Giants saying that he wanted the team's Super Bowl rings to be '10-table' rings - meaning that you could see the ring from ten tables away in a restaurant.

That sounded pretty cool, but I hadn't gotten a look at the rings, but I finally found pictures on The Gothamist website.



Now, it's hard to tell how big it is, since there's nothing to compare it to, but it looks pretty nice. What I will say is that a lot of guys on recent Super Bowl winners have said that they leave their rings at home, or in a safe-deposit box, because they are just garishly big - like the size of a pizza plate on their finger.

Also, for my money (which it isn't) give me yellow gold over white gold or platinum any time.

Thanks for Nuttin', Moises!

Did you see the story were Moises Alou has changed his story about the Steve Bartman incident? Right after it happened, back in the 2003 NLCS, he said that "almost 100 percent" he would have caught that ball.

Now, he's saying, ""You know what the funny thing is? I wouldn't have caught it, anyway.''

That *IS* funny, Moises! It's downright hilarious. I'm laughing so hard I think I lost control of my bladder function and tinkled in my pants!

Speaking of tinkling, don't your hands need a urine bath or something? Go make yourself useful.

Poor Bartman - dude's life is ruined. If anyone's life should be ruined it's Alex Gonzalez, the then-shortstop for the Cubs who kicked a routine double-play ball only seconds after the Bartman foul ball - if Gonzalez makes that play, we never know Bartman's name.

Now the guy has been in hiding for five years, and he's probably changed his name - like Jeff Gillooly did after his marriage to Tonya Harding.

Bartman - try using 'Jeff Stone'; it worked for Gillooly.


---JohnnyU

Stephen Curry, We Hardly Knew Ye...

Did anyone besides me audibly gasp when Stephen Curry dished off the ball to teammate Jason Richards to take the last shot against Kansas? I understand that Curry was wearing two Jayhawk defenders like a sweater and socks, but less than a minute earlier (with 00:57 left), Curry spotted up and buried a 3-pointer, making it 59-57. Was there a single person in the building who thought anyone BUT Curry would take that last shot? Now we'll never know if he woulda made it. I feel cheated.

Beastie Boys say, "I'll kick you outta my home if you don't CUT THAT HAIR!"

Reports are surfacing that at the NFL owners meetings in Florida next week, the league is going to propose a "No Long Hair" rule for players, which might turn into a somewhat bushy problem for Troy Polamalu.

Couldn't they just name the rule 'The Polamalu Rule'? I mean, who do they think they're kidding?

Though there could also be some consideration given for calling it the 'Al Harris Rule' or the 'Mike McKenzie Rule', though neither of those guys have been *tackled* by their hair the way Polamalu has.

There is some precedence in this area - when they instituted a new rule a couple of years ago: 'The Horse-Collar Rule'. They couldn't have named that rule after Roy Williams? After all, the genesis of the rule was *clearly* due to #31's predilection for grabbing a guy by the shoulder pads and riding him like a toboggan into the ground.

Why couldn't they have called it the Roy Williams Rule? Who would that be hurting? I'd get a big kick out of it, and Roy couldn't possibly complain, as the following pictures conclusively demonstrate:



But don't expect the NFL owners to be creative enough to call this 'The Polamalu Rule', just like you shouldn't expect to see Troy (or any other NFL player) to get tackled by their hair again any time soon.



---JohnnyU

Supah-Genius

Candidate for the Darwin Awards, for sure...

Story can be found here



Wed Mar 26, 10:02 PM ET

CHICAGO - An alleged thief wasn't fazed when workers at a Chicago muffler shop told him a safe he wanted to rob wasn't open. He just asked them to give him a call when their boss returned with the combination.

The 18-year-old got a call. But so did Chicago police.

When Ruben Carate returned to Velasquez & Sons Mufflers For Less on Monday, plainclothes Chicago police officers shot and wounded him in the leg. Carate was charged Tuesday with attempted armed robbery and aggravated assault of a police officer, the Cook County state's attorney's office said.

"He gave us his phone number when we told him we didn't have any money. He told us to call him back when the owner came back with the money and he was going to come back and rob him," said worker Tony Diaz.

"It's pretty funny now, but it wasn't at the time," Diaz said.

A masked man entered the shop with a gun and demanded money around 8 a.m., said mechanic Jose Sida.

Employees told him they carried little cash and couldn't open the safe, so the man left two numbers to call when the owner came in, Sida said.

"No one could make this up," said police Lt. Scott Schwieger.

The man returned around noon, wearing the same mask and clothing. Officers told employees to get to the back of the shop, Sida said.

Carate was treated at Advocate Illinois Masonic Medical Center for a gunshot wound, said Mark Payne, a spokesman for the Independent Police Review Authority. An inquiry into the shooting will take six months to complete, he said.

UCLA is Good... and Lucky...

There's been a lot of hullaballoo about the end of the UCLA-Texas A&M game, and whether or not A&M's Donald Sloan (who took the last shot) was fouled on the play. Now, I'm actually a Bruin alum, so I'd love to believe that there was no foul (ALL BALL!), but after looking at these pictures, it's hard to keep the faith in that respect.

He may have brushed his arm slightly...

This was probably not a foul, because
Josh Shipp didn't use BOTH hands?